I am one of those people who needs corrective lenses to see much beyond the tip of my own nose. When I got my first pair of glasses at age five, I remember seeing lines between telephone poles for the first time, and my mother told me that I commented on the individual leaves on the trees. To turn a saying on its head, I could finally see the trees for the forest. The world as I had once known it had suddenly–magically, it seemed at the time–transformed, come into focus. Of course, the world hadn’t changed at all. I was just seeing it as it had always been.

Learning about giftedness–what it looks like, what it feels like, and how it affects individuals and families–changed my view of the world in a similar way. Like many parents, I was unaware of the very idea of giftedness until our child reached school age, when a gifted and talented coordinator handed me a book about gifted young children. Suddenly, not only did I understand our son and his needs better, but I also gained a new, clearer perspective on many of my family members, friends, and co-workers, allowing me to be more patient and compassionate. Behaviors in others that had once baffled or frustrated me now made some sense.

Ages and Stages Through the Lens of Giftedness

A tour of some of the articles in the SENG Articles Library helps us to gain a clearer vision of giftedness through the lifespan. Dr. Edward R. Amend, former SENG Director, explains that giftedness can be understood as a combination of certain traits and behaviors, and the uneven (or asynchronous) development common to gifted children:

If you pick up just about any book on gifted children, you will find a list of typical characteristics of gifted children. These lists typically include things like strong memory, large vocabulary, persistence, and a wide range of interests. Gifted children typically learn to read earlier than other children and show an intensity that cuts across all interests and activities. These characteristics typically persist into adulthood. However, I believe that asynchronous or uneven development and the fact that gifted children really do see the world differently than others are two traits that truly differentiate a gifted person.  Read More…

Asynchronous development is perhaps at no time more evident than in early childhood, when a child’s learning can far outstrip that of classmates. At the same time, physical and emotional maturation may be at age level or even lower. Beverly Shaklee, former SENG Director, explains:

Young children in general are very complex. They are amazing in the tasks, abilities and areas that they develop in the first five to eight years of their life; some researchers estimate upwards of 80% of all of their deep knowledge is constructed at that time. Having a young child who is also cognitively gifted gives added dimension to that complexity. Read More…

As gifted children move into middle school, their academic potential can tempt parents and teachers to focus heavily on children’s intellectual needs and college preparation. However, as Alan L. Edmunds and Gail A. Edmunds remind us in “Sensitivity: A Double-Edged Sword for the Pre-adolescent and Adolescent Child,” the teen years are also times of intense emotions and self-searching, also part of life’s curriculum:

Given the emotional challenges of the adolescent period, perhaps … the focus for the education of the pre-adolescent and adolescent gifted child should be on recognizing and supporting the child’s heightened sensitivity, or emotionality, rather than merely focusing on curricula learned or talents exhibited. Helping gifted children to face the pressures of conforming to societal expectations, including conforming to sex-role stereotypes, may be the ultimate education for the sensitive child. Read More…

Our son is now in college, but his giftedness certainly didn’t go away when he began or even graduated from high school. Parents of gifted teens know that challenges of parenting do not end with early adulthood. Former SENG Director Nadia Webb writes about how giftedness feeds a teen’s usual “slightly delusional set of perceptions,” and advises adults on how to address the challenging world of what she calls “teenager logic”:

Know that teen logic isn’t personal. The problem is that the person with bad judgment lacks the judgment to recognize that they have bad judgment. All of this storm and fury is exactly why we don’t let them vote, buy liquor or get married yet. Just breathe and keep reminding yourself that one of you has to be the grownup.  Read More…

Finally, we can also remember that throughout our children’s growth from infants to adults, they develop in many different ways: intellectually, emotionally, physically, morally, spiritually, and socially. Linda Kreger Silverman discusses the developmental phases of social development from early childhood through adolescence in terms of gender differences:

Due to their expert ability to pick up social cues, girls are better than boys at imitation. Therefore, it is important for them to be in an environment where imitation is conducive to growth. If they live in a home filled with kindness, they learn to be kind. If they live next door to children who call each other names, they learn how to swear. And if a girl who is mentally eight years old is placed in a kindergarten with only five year olds, she will imitate the behavior of five year olds. Read More…

The Gift of Seeing

As I grow older, I no longer take my vision for granted. Just as I need to update my lens prescription periodically or add bifocals or reading glasses, I find that I see the world and others with more clarity and appreciation as I continue to learn about giftedness.

Recently I attended a family funeral where I was struck by the adult lives of my cousins and brothers, all of whom have taken paths that, while not always easy, have certainly never been boring. I was also touched by the life and vibrancy of the older generation. My aunts’ eyes, even at a time of sorrow, danced with life. The collective emotional growth, strength, and wisdom in the room of mourning was nearly palpable, calling to mind SENG’s focus on gifted individuals–children and adults–and its recognition of the importance of interdependence in positive growth.

Deirdre V. Lovecky writes in “Can You Hear the Flowers Sing? Issues for Gifted Adults” that  “An ability to view several aspects of a situation simultaneously, to understand several layers of self within another, and to see quickly to the core of an issue are characteristic of the trait of perceptivity” and that “People who are gifted at ‘seeing’ often seem to have a touch of magic about them.” She concludes, “Sharing one’s particular gifts with another can be a source of both self-sustenance and connectedness to others.”

Let’s take the opportunity this month to share our own gift of seeing by noticing and celebrating the “touch of magic” that exists all around us, from toddlers and teens to empty nesters and grandparents. SENG’s missionaffirms that with proper support, “gifted individuals can develop abilities that enhance their own lives and the lives of others” and that one of SENG’s goals “is to empower caring families and communities to influence more positively and effectively the development of giftedness in those individuals entrusted to their care.” Resources in SENG’s Articles Library support this mission and show where our vision may still be fuzzy, where we may not be seeing the world as clearly as we can, and where we can better enhance lives and empower others.

Lisa Rivero is a freelance writer, book indexer, and college teacher. Her family’s positive experience with homeschooling led her to write Creative Home Schooling: A Resource Guide for Smart Families (Great Potential Press, 2002), which won the 2003 Glyph Best Education Book Award, and The Homeschooling Option (Palgrave Macmillan, 2008). Her articles have appeared in several publications, some of which are Parenting for High Potential, Understanding Gifted Children, The Roeper Review, and The Duke Gifted Letter. Lisa received her B.A. from Marquette University and her M.A. in Literary Studies from the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee. As an Adjunct Assistant Professor at the Milwaukee School of Engineering, she teaches creative thinking, technical communication, and other courses designed to instill engineers with a love of the humanities. Lisa leads workshops on homeschooling, parenting, giftedness, and creativity at national, state and local conferences, including the National Association of Gifted Children (NAGC), SENG, and the Wisconsin Parent Association (WPA). She is currently writing a book for teens about learning with intensity, and a book for parents about gifted homeschooling for middle school and high school.